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Unleash Your Strengths Mini Workshop ft Strengthscope

unleash your strengths workshop

Think about a time you were at your best.  Now, think about a word to describe you at your best.  When was the last time you experienced this?

You should feel energized in your role. You are what drives the business, and you spend most of your time at work.  When you’re not at the top of your game, it affects your performance and impacts the organization. So, how can you do both what you love and what you’re good at?  

In this two-hour workshop, you’ll explore areas that motivate you as well as drain you. By looking at the times you felt your best and were “in the zone,” you can identify your key competencies and connect those strengths with what truly drives you. You can then allocate your time and focus on areas that are meaningful and productive, improving your overall quality of work.  

What to Expect:

You’ll receive your personalized strengths profile as part of the workshop, and through exploring your strengths and the areas that energize you the most, you’ll understand how to effectively bring forth your best self at work while balancing out any performance risks (areas of weakness and overdrive). The workshop will help you activate your full potential by positive self-awareness.

Logistics:

  • June 12 at Carriage House 1431 Waverly St, Palo Alto, CA 94301
  • June 13 at 1155 5th Street, Oakland, CA, 94607
  • Each workshop is open to 20 people (max three people from company)
  • 2 hours in duration with a mixer to follow, including light appetizers and wine
  • $225 per participant, including a personalized Strengthscope profile (value of $395)

Not only will you get to figure out how to stay positive and productive, but you’ll have time to connect with other leaders and build your network after the workshop. Register today.

Can’t make either of these workshops?  No problem; contact Dragonfly Consultants, and we’ll come to you.

Watch Strengthscope’s COO, Josh Allan Dykstra, share more about the Upgrade Your Energy mini workshop.

Virtual Reality and Diversity

Virtual Reality and Diversity

“Ethics are how we behave when we decide we belong together.”  – Unknown

Last weekend, I presented at the The Expat Woman’s Empowered Women’s Leadership Summit and spoke about “Leveraging Virtual Reality to Overcome Gender Bias”(or any bias for that matter).  The quick and dirty bottom line is men and women do not understand or share the same beliefs about the problem.  Data shows, especially in the tech industry, that gender discrimination exists in many different forms, from sexual assault, to treatment in behavior, to pay practices, to promotional practices, and so on.  However, men and women continue to see it differently. Men are less ready to see the gravity of it, and women are fed up with men who don’t take it seriously.Gender Bias

We have introduced the use of an award-winning Virtual Reality film that explores what it is like to be a young woman coder.  When I explained that to women and men participating in a demo of the film, they all seemed interested.  But, when I told them if they turned their head they would then experience what it is like to be in the body of her male boss, almost unanimously everyone’s mouth dropped open.  

Gender Bias

We have to understand the conditions for both men and women and why it is so hard to get this right.  I won’t give away the story, but it is important to understand that power imbalance occurs in many ways when conducting business. It creates ethical dilemmas that can be very difficult to navigate both for women and men.

But on a daily basis, when there is a power imbalance, it can easily be overlooked.  I remember years ago, being in a meeting where I spoke up, was quickly passed over to someone else, and ten minutes later my male counterpart offered the same idea and got the credit. When I raised my voice to defend myself, I was seen as defensive, overly emotional, not one of the guys, or when I stood my ground, a “bitch.”  Over time, I would pick my battles, or not even try. I did not love my work, nor was I bringing my best self to work over time. My ethical choice was a paycheck over walking away at the time. These kinds of reinforcing behavior cycles are toxic to organizations, especially to creating inclusive cultures.

So why do I bring this up?  The virtual reality experience is a way to have a felt experience from the perspective of both the woman and the man.  In the movie, the ethical choices they make to either speak up or lose something they value occurs in both genders. Even the best intentioned of us are put into situations that make us ask ourselves: could we be better?  

The virtual reality experience opens the door to have a deeper dialogue about the individual experience and  the group dynamics that make it hard to speak up. We have data that supports after being immersed in virtual reality both men and women have:

  • A higher sense of personal responsibility to advance Gender Equality at Work
  • A higher desire to monitor one’s self and others’ behaviors for gender biases

We learn to have the social courage and skills to engage in high stakes conversations and call out unhealthy behaviors.   With the bad behavior out of the way, we have better and more healthy conversations about business issues and opportunities leveraging the benefit of the diversity in the room.  This does not mean walking on eggshells and being ultra-politically “correct”. It means respect, ethical decisions, and authentic relationships at work.

The positive change can only be sustained with the alignment of the organizational culture and the accountability of the organization’s governance structures and leadership.  In my experience, when policy is displayed in the behavior of the leadership and people in the organization, good things happen – even when the odds seem stacked.

Examples of this exist.  Dragonfly has been working with a company in an industry typically seen as male dominated.  During relationship with this company, they hired their first two sales women in the 100-year history of the company!  And later a third. These women attribute their success to a culture and leadership that demands respect and equality, judges everyone individually, and addresses gender equality issues head on.  They love their work! The company benefits from them loving their work as do all the men that work with them.

Virtual reality is not the magic pill to make it alright, but it is an accelerator for positive change.  If you would like to learn more about how to create a more inclusive work environment, get in touch with us today.

When Did Reading Become a Luxury?

Reading in the Bathtub

When I was a little girl, I used to read under the covers with a flashlight until I could barely hold my eyes open. I love to read! When I started college, I worked, took classes and focused on reading what was expected to complete the courses, setting aside my beloved list of leisure reading. And even then, it was a stretch for me to read anything cover to cover.  Speed reading and targeted reading became par for the course, taking much of the enjoyment out of what is normally for me a time for replenishment and deep reflection.

Here I am a half-century later with a career that requires I stay in the forefront of research and news. I have a child, who I spend time reading with and to, and a long list of leisure reading that I can barely dent.

Bathroom time is where I spend the most time actually reading, using that time for both professional and leisure reading. I admit it. And, I am not proud of it. Though I like my bathroom, serene in its décor, it is not dedicated time… It’s like reading a book by paragraphs.

So, I am asking myself: if reading is so essential to my career, to supporting my child, and to my feeling replenished, inspired, and creative, how do I prioritize it as it should be prioritized… I mean how do I get out of the bathroom?

In this reflection, I discovered something that sort of surprised me. I consider reading for my profession not a part of my work. Almost like it is a condition for doing my work that needs to be completed outside of working hours. I asked myself, why am I doing homework for work?  I made a decision: professional reading is now an on-the-job assignment.  It is time to include it as a priority and an important part of my work day.

In continuing my reflection, I began to realize my mother-daughter time reading seemed on the surface to be the right thing to do. But my daughter is an avid and independent reader.  My reading to her was more about my needs. It was more about wanting my little girl to need me. That discovery led me to the following idea: Change how we spend our reading time together. I created special side-side reading time. Each of us independently reading our favorite books right next to each other and role modeling the love for reading by reading what I love.

I still have very full days with never enough time to get through my reading list, but I have improved. I have also confronted my own self-imposed expectations.  Most importantly, I have changed my perspective of reading.  It is no longer a luxury that I can not afford, but a pleasure well within my budget.

My Tips:

  • Reading is inspirational to me. I schedule reading time before writing or designing time.  It feeds my thought process and get’s my creative juices going.
  • Sometimes I replace “rockin-out” in my commute with listening to audio books.
  • I join book study groups. Book study provides structure and keeps me goal oriented and accountable. And I learn from others’ perspectives during the discussion time.
  • I don’t punish myself for not reading cover to cover. It’s not how I read business books anyway. However, I occasionally find the page turner that keeps me reading all the way to the end and wanting more.
  • I read on planes (even the airline magazines).

 

Share your tips on how you make time for reading or please share any book recommendations.

 

Join Dragonfly Consultants in their new group book study called Read to Lead. With joining Read to Lead, you’ll get to connect and learn with other leaders and discuss leadership development in a guided virtual session led by one of Dragonfly Consultants’ co-founders, Adrienne Seal. Each session will also feature the book’s author in a 45-minute Q&A. To learn more and to sign up, visit Read to Lead’s Invitation.

Read to Lead Group Book Study

“Today a reader, tomorrow a leader.” – Margaret Fuller

Dragonfly Consultants is offering a series of Read to Lead group book study sessions, starting next January 2018. Join us in the Dragonfly Reading Room (virtual) as we explore and discuss books on a variety of interests that will be sure to engage, challenge and inspire you as a leader. With each selected book, participants will read on their own and then join in on a lively 90-minute discussion led by a Dragonfly moderator and special guests, the authors of each book. The reading room is limited to 20 participants. You can still register for the last session for Humble Inquiry with Ed Schein on May 7th for $25. To sign up, get tickets here.

What participants will get out of the book study sessions:

  • Study guide questions
  • Post meeting recording
  • Access to a private Dragonfly Reading Room Linkedin group where you can continue the learning
  • Overall, the ability to connect, discuss and learn with other leaders, the books’ authors and experts

Layout of each virtual session:

  • First 45 minutes – Book discussion facilitated by Dragonfly Consultants
  • Last 45 minutes – Q&A with the book’s author

Featured books and sessions: 

Michael Papanek’s From Breakdown to Breakthrough on January 12, 2018 from 5:00pm – 6:30pm PST 

Read to Lead Group Book Study Book 1 - From Breakdown to BreakthroughIn From Breakdown to Breakthrough, Papanek introduces the concept of the heat curve, a graphical representation that shows how relationships perform under stress. There comes a point where the “heat” – in the form of creative tension, interpersonal conflict, and extreme emotions – becomes too much for the relationship to handle, which leads to breakdown. The goal of building resilient relationships is to shift the heat curve as far as possible, so that it can withstand heat before breaking down.  “The more resilience you have, the higher you are able to ride the heat curve and leverage the benefits of increasing stress, without the costs,” he says.

Michael Papanek, grandson of the pioneer of group dynamics and organizational psychology, Kurt Lewin, draws from the latest research and his thirty years’ track record of success with clients, including Apple, Facebook, VMWare, Salesforce, Kaiser and Google to reveal the success strategies of the most resilient leaders.

 

Florence Williams’ The Nature Fix on March 12, 2018 from 5:00pm – 6:30pm PST 

Read to Lead Group Book Study Book 2 - The Nature FixFor centuries, poets and philosophers extolled the benefits of a walk in the woods: Beethoven drew inspiration from rocks and trees; Wordsworth composed while tromping over the heath; Nikola Tesla conceived the electric motor while visiting a park. Intrigued by our storied renewal in the natural world, Florence Williams sets out to uncover the science behind nature’s positive effects on the brain in The Nature Fix

From forest trails in Korea, to islands in Finland, to groves of eucalyptus in California, Williams investigates the science at the confluence of environment, mood, health, and creativity. Delving into completely new research, she uncovers the powers of the natural world to improve health, promote reflection and innovation, and ultimately strengthen our relationships. As our modern lives shift dramatically indoors, these ideas—and the answers they yield—are more urgent than ever.

 

Edgar Schein’s Humble Inquiry on May 7, 2018 from 5:00pm – 6:30pm PST 

Read to Lead Group Book Study Book 3 - Humble InquiryCommunication is essential in a healthy organization. But all too often when we interact with people—especially those who report to us—we simply tell them what we think they need to know. This shuts them down. To generate bold new ideas, to avoid disastrous mistakes, to develop agility and flexibility, we need to practice Humble Inquiry.

Ed Schein defines Humble Inquiry as “the fine art of drawing someone out, of asking questions to which you do not know the answer, of building a relationship based on curiosity and interest in the other person.” In this seminal work, Schein contrasts Humble Inquiry with other kinds of inquiry, shows the benefits Humble Inquiry provides in many different settings, and offers advice on overcoming the cultural, organizational, and psychological barriers that keep us from practicing it.

Leadership Message: Purpose Matters in Business

“Lean in to Purpose” – Jonathan Mildenhall

I was recently at a conference where Jonathan Mildenhall was a keynote speaker. For those of you who don’t know Jonathan (and I don’t expect you to), he was previously the Chief Marketing Officer at Coca Cola and is now the Chief Marketing Officer at AirBnB. His marketing pedigree is not the topic of this message, but his passion for building “purpose-driven companies” is.

His presentation was fantastic. In fact, as he took us through a journey of his career and some of the hallmark marketing campaigns he has overseen with Coca Cola and AirBnB, you could clearly see the impact that purpose has on those two organizations. And it’s not that these two companies are charities – far from that. But their commitment to purpose helped drive both to notable growth and brand success. Consider the following elements of purpose from each of these companies:

  • Coca Cola: To refresh the world… To inspire moments of optimism and happiness…
  • AirBnB: Creating real connections/friendships between like-minded people

When you think about it, those are meaningful and impactful purpose statements. They say something unique and different about the culture of each company and can inspire both employees and customers alike behind their brand.

Which leads me to the purpose (a little play on words) of this post. Purpose-driven companies are more successful than those who are not. And by successful, I mean in virtually every aspect of its definition – growth, profit, engagement, retention, and satisfaction. As leaders and team members alike, the importance of embracing purpose in business has never been more important.

Jonathan’s speech inspired me to do a little research on the concept of both “purpose” and “purpose-driven companies.” Turns out this isn’t such a new concept. Having “purpose” in our lives is the essence of what it means to be human. Our consciousness and awareness of both ourselves and others, the knowledge of our mortality, the need for meaning, and the yearning to make something of it is what separates us from all other animals.

Ask any Millennial, and they will tell you quickly now important purpose is to them. Ask any Boomer to reminisce on their youthful days, and they will no doubt recognize the same struggle for purpose behind their generational stereotypes. And for those stuck in the middle (like me), no doubt our struggle to be recognized as something other than some random letter (Gen X – how generic can you get) is driven by the need for purpose.

So if purpose is so fundamental to what makes us human, why only recently are we hearing so much about its place in business? Again, not a new concept. There are examples throughout history of organizations whose existence was closely tied to purpose. To be fair, not all businesses embrace this concept. But there are plenty that do. The more recent awareness is likely tied to the advancement of technology and the awareness it has created. With social media, the gravity of the masses are empowered to recognize and both reward or punish those organizations that don’t embrace purpose.

But what I find most interesting is how dramatic the impact is for purpose-driven companies. In researching for this message, I did a search on Google for “why purpose-driven companies are more successful.” I got back 20 million results. Articles from Harvard Business Review, E&Y, Forbes, Fast Company, Inc., Huffington Post, Gallup – to name a few. Consider the following studies that suggest purpose-driven companies:

  • Have more motivated employees. According to a recent study by BNET, “29% of respondents said that doing something meaningful was the most motivating thing about work. Money motivated 25%, and recognition 17%.” (BNET)
  • Increased productivity by up to 30% (Center for Economic Studies)
  • See improved engagement scores of up to 240% higher (Gallup)

The outcome is an increase in both revenue and profit. According to one recent 10-year study by The Purpose Institute:

  • 42% of companies that were not considered “purpose-driven” showed a drop in revenues.
  • On the other side, 85% of purpose-led companies showed positive revenue growth.

No wonder noted business strategists like Jim Collins, Peter Drucker and others have harped on the importance of purpose in building a business. Many share the same sentiments as Paul Klein of Forbes Magazine: “Great companies go beyond ubiquitous statements of corporate values to nurture a dialogue to keep social purpose at the forefront of everyone’s mind and ensure that employees use the organizational values as a guide for business decisions.”

Purpose matters in business. Will you “Lean in to purpose?

 

Kip Wright Lean In To PurposeAbout Kip Wright

Kip is the President and CEO of Genuent, a national IT staffing and Project support provider. Prior to Genuent, Kip was President of Manpower Global. He’s also the Champion for the promotion of new age leadership principles. To read more of his blog posts, visit www.leadingwright.com.

Where are you in the Expatriate Journey? A Reflection of My First Experience

(In my previous blog post, I provided insights into the Stages of the Expatriate Acculturation Journey. With an introduction of those stages, now I’d like to share my first experience moving abroad and what my journey as an expat looked like…)

My First Experience Abroad in a Cowboy & Indigenous Indian Town  

Who would’ve anticipated that from my first abroad experience that began in January 2005, I would go on to have five more international moves in less than seven years? I certainly wouldn’t have and neither would those who knew me. How did this come to be? I’ll begin with the first experience, the first in a series of blog posts.

Stage 1. Pre-departure: Am I really doing this?

When the opportunity came my husband’s way to help a company build their Mexico business and operations from the ground up, it was a challenge that he couldn’t refuse. But, what did this mean for us? What about my career? I had recently started a new position at Intel, a role that involved working with people from around the globe. The technology was complex; the stakeholders were complex; there was resistance; there was dysfunction. The role required a significant amount of influence to build trust on a project that already had a bad reputation. My first 90-days were critical to my success and the success of the project. How was I going to be able to perform effectively abroad? The answer is in the former. My team and stakeholders were global – I would never meet most of them in person. This was part of the culture.

But, how was I going to approach this with my manager? I seized the moment in a comfortable space – we were at the gym on the elliptical. When I mentioned to him that I needed to “talk to him,” he said, “don’t tell me you’re quitting.” My response – “depends…” I explained the situation, and he responded with “You’ll work remotely. Your team is global; there’s really nothing different. Let’s try it out. I can’t lose you”

Since the organizational culture supported a balance of office and remote work, the transition to 100% remote was an organic process. To prepare, I began to spend one day per week in the office, then I began working 100% remotely while still in the US to ensure that my team felt supported and were prepared. It was going to require a degree of trust and self-management on both ends. During the entire process, I never had one person question my decision or doubt my ability to perform from afar. I only recall support, professionally. Perhaps they were skeptical or had doubt, but it was not voiced. If anything, I formed connections with others who had also lived abroad and with those living in undeveloped countries. I don’t’ think any of us realized it at the time, but they were my support channels.

Coincidentally, I was in the process of selling my home. I was able to sell it, have a moving sale, and move somewhere temporarily until my move. I even had someone to watch my cats until I could get a pulse on the situation and come back for them.

Then came the administrative challenges – Where do I get my mail sent? What do we do with our cars? What about banking, cell phone service, health insurance, healthcare and good internet connection?  That is an entire topic on its own that I will spare the details in this blog. We did sell one car; I decided to store my car for when I traveled back, and my husband drove our SUV to Mexico.

A few weeks prior to departure, my husband, Ryan, asked me if I would be flexible in going to a town called Creel instead of Oaxaca. Creel? I Googled it. A Cowboy and Indian town that is the gateway to the Copper Canyon at nearly 8,000 feet elevation. Population around 5,000 with the nearest airport three hours away in Chihuahua City. It’s a recreation mecca, the Copper Canyon is four times the volume of the Grand Canyon. Being an outdoors fanatic that I am, I embraced the idea. My only requirement was that we had a high-speed internet connection.

Ryan drove to Mexico, and two weeks later, I hopped on a plane and met him in Chihuahua. He found the only place for rent that had a phone line. This is important to mention because back then, you may wait up to two years to get a phone line. We upgraded from dial-up to high speed and ran the phone line from the downstairs laundromat to our apartment. You heard right, our phone line was in the laundromat.

Stage 3 Culture Shock: Is this really happening?

Why not the honeymoon period? Two days after arriving, Ryan had to leave on a 10-day trip. Yes, two days in a new country – I am terrible at Spanish, no friends, and am learning to drive a manual car. Besides immersing myself in work (Intel greatly benefited from my situation), I quickly became resourceful. I went to the rustic Best Western and asked if I could pay for use of their spa and gym. They were bewildered with my request but accepted. This became my sanctuary, especially during the cold nights since temperatures were in the high 60’s – 70’s during the day, hail in the evenings, and typically below freezing at night.

WaterfallI, then, went to a basketball game with the owner of the casa that we rented and attended a birthday party with his family afterward. When we arrived, I was offered a cerveza, and I accepted. I sat with the women (women and men socialized separately), and was the only female drinking. I later realized that the attendance of the basketball game with the husband was not a cultural norm and that in that social circle, women typically didn’t drink. For a gringa, it was, however, acceptable. The next day was a Saturday, so I drove a remote, mountainous road to a recreation area to go hiking solo. After asking several people in broken Spanish, I found the trail I was looking for. The wildness and spirituality were overwhelming.

Ryan had introduced me to a few people in the community prior to his trip, and I am forever thankful to the women who invited me over for dinner, coffee and trips to the hot springs. We are friends to this day. They provided my intellectual outlet and helped me with the day-to-day. I learned that fresh vegetables were delivered to small mom and pop markets on Thursdays, and Mennonites brought fresh bread and cheese on Saturday. Fresh vegetables consisted of wilted broccoli with pre-washed spinach as a treat. There were few restaurants and only two bars of which only one would you want to venture in. The result was that we spent virtually no money. I made hummus with lime (you could not buy lemons) and mashed them with a fork. We made a lot of soup.

Michelle standing outside with two native Norogachi Mich RaramuriHowever, I realized it was important to get into a routine. Since India was a core part of my team, we rotated who shared the burden of night meetings every month. My manager would check-in to make sure that I took a break in the afternoon on nights we had to work. I would take a hike, then go the gym or bicycle in Tarahumaran country (Tarahumaran Indians are known as the ultra-marathon “runners” who Nike discovered). Notice a theme – an organizational culture, leadership, and teammates that supported not only my situation but were aware of other’s situations. In India, some people took a bus two hours to work each day, women needed safe transport to work, and the monsoon season caused electrical and internet outages. I now had something in common with my counterparts there. I had empathy.

If only video conference was common then and my co-workers could see where I was working… and if only I would’ve had a coach or a community of first-timers to confide in, to tell me it was ok to have the ups and downs, to feel like the trailing spouse, to work through not being able to wander the halls.Michelle working from home on her laptop with a headset

The reality was that it was my first international move and to parts of Mexico extremely remote and highly traditional with high rates of poverty. Some of the Tarahumarans still lived in remote cave dwellings, didn’t speak Spanish and subsisted on very basic diets. There wasn’t a honeymoon period; it was humbling and forever changed me. I adventured as much as I could, and I established Mexican friendships. Even though I took the time each day for exercise or my outlet in nature, I found myself working long hours from my house with minimal daily integration and contact with the community. English was not commonly spoken, and there were no formal Spanish courses being taught or meetup or professional groups. Women played a traditional role in society. I often felt isolated.  

Each person’s experience is unique, and there are no hard and fast timetables to adjusting to your new life. But, there are tools and strategies that make this process faster and easier. This incredible experience is as much personal as it is geographic; your journey will be defined by how you react to the more challenging moments.

My next chapter begins with our move to Oaxaca, which presented an entirely new set of challenges and experiences that will stay with me for a lifetime. 

Leadership is a Group Activity

I was born at a time when Gloria Steinem’s name tripped off the tongue of every woman as part of the second wave feminist movement. I had many strong female role models, including my own family. Our voices, those of my generation and my mother’s generation, shaped a new narrative for women, breaking barriers and paving the way for women to take their place as leaders. Our declaration has always been at the center of it:we are stronger together than apart.  

“A dream you dream alone is only a dream; a dream you dream together is reality.”  John Lennon

Today, women of all generations are facing similar divisive forces but on a new battleground.  The doors may have been opened, but the culture remains the same.  Galvanized, we understand our movement is bigger than any one of us.  

I recently went to an event where men and women gathered to listen to a known leader in the women’s movement, Valerie Jarrett.  And during the event, audience members asked questions, made comments and talked about their experiences.  In the moment, one woman reached out to another from across the room and offered an opportunity to be a part of her company.  The overall experience was like I was in a giant invitation to be a part of something bigger.  The invitation created space for more of these micro gestures of support and change.  

Group of Leaders in the Women's MarchUpon reflection, I realized women and leadership have a style we have learned from years of experience and history related to our role as caretakers and matriarchs of our families, community leaders and organizers, and in our participation in the women’s movement.  

So…What have we learned?

Leadership is a group activity.

What does that mean?

A leader is what galvanizes a group into action, but the group must want to believe in the dream.

  1. A leader believes the group has the answers.  It requires an invitation and the ability to step back and trust what happens.
  2. Leadership is about abundance.  It is the opposite of limited resources.  It is the belief that the group is resourceful when working together or with other groups, and through that, we find abundance of both resources and answers.  
  3. Leadership is about resilience, but not just personal resilience.  Resilience of the group means that at any one time when one person is down, another offers a hand in support, and the group is stronger for it.
  4. Leadership is about optimism.  The energy and strength of the group is what allows us to rise above any challenge.  As Heraclitus wrote in ancient Greece, “The sun is new each day.
  5. Leadership is about empathy. The ability to see a situation with clarity and suspension of judgement. A means to understanding difficult problems from all sides. To appreciate diversity. To learn.
  6. Leadership is about a cause. You can’t be a leader if you don’t believe in change.  Leadership is the ability to provide the space for the group to pause and take notice, be present and see clearly the difference between the noise and the truth. To be a part of the change they want to create.Group of women at the women's march

The women’s movement has an agenda. It is a cause. And, it has also provided us a perspective on leadership that is not necessarily gender specific but has many female role models.  However, at the heart of this cause, is changing the culture of individualism and self-service to that of harnessing the energy of the group. By removing the conditions that divide, we can  reach across to invite others to participate. It is the profile of a leader who understands issues of bias and inequality have no place in their organizations. In fact, they truly believe diversity and equality are a core competency and a right and what makes groups stronger. And leadership does not have to be lonely.  

“If you want to go fast go alone, if you want to go far go together”  (African proverb)   

Where have you seen examples of this type of leadership?

Lipstick on a Donkey: The Ugly Truth About Company Culture

We are living in bold times.  Where what we imagine is no longer imaginary; it’s reality.  With the speed of technology and constantly changing competitive landscapes, organizations need to be innovative, in front of trends and intimately involved with their customers.  They need smart, emotionally intelligent, critical thinkers, who are passionate about what they do.  Not afraid to take risks, fail and learn – Not afraid to challenge the status quo, not afraid to ask for change…

I hear leaders echo these sentiments, or at least some combination of them, yet they exist in companies that struggle to create the conditions necessary to retain the kind of talent they are looking for.  Their culture is perfectly designed to behave the way it is behaving perfectly.  And then, I hear leaders tell their organizations things like this:

“I’ve said it before we have a fantastic team, and I am truly impressed by the behavior, the dedication… We have a culture of honesty… I want to retain all those elements while creating conditions to improve…”

The Ugly Truth

Lipstick on a Donkey.  Why is it so hard to be honest?  If you want a company culture designed to attract, retain and grow smart, emotionally intelligent, critical thinkers who are passionate about what they do, then you need to treat them as smart, emotionally intelligent, critical thinkers, who passionately understand that shade of lipstick just isn’t working.

They also are not afraid of looking at the donkey without lipstick.  They are not afraid to examine the culture, the beliefs, behaviors, habits and rituals… They want to change the conditions.

What do we mean by conditions?

These are choices we make about policy, process, organization design and talent that either make your desired company culture possible or make your desired culture impossible.  It shapes how people in the organization lead, manage and work.  It is the difference between a company positioned to grow and one that staggers and fails.

Imagine any one of these commonly talked about values below represents what you desire in your culture.

  • Collaboration
  • Innovation
  • Courage
  • Speed

Now, ask yourself: What would need to be true in order for these values to exist?   What are the obstacles that make living that culture impossible?  What belief is behind the policy choice, process choice, or talent choice?

Now, let’s examine one.

Collaboration  

What makes collaboration important in this culture?  Why, where, when, how and who needs to collaborate?  The Why is most important.  You may discover that collaboration is not an enabler for success in the type of company you have.  It may conflict with another value you have.  Do you have systems and processes that support collaboration?  Are you designed to work as teams?  If not, do individuals have the similar priorities and objectives? Do they have enough shared interest to invest themselves in collaboration?  Do you have talent in your organization that likes to collaborate, or is that profile non-existent?  Does your talent have the skills to collaborate effectively?  Do they have a healthy relationship with conflicting ideas?

I think you get where this is going.  Take a value and get curious.  Figure out what the implication is to how you lead, how you manage and how you work. Then, identify if this value really fits with what you are trying to do as a company.  Does it enable you to achieve your strategy, or is it less important than something else?

Most of all, wipe off the lipstick.

Where Are You in the Expatriate Journey? 5 Stages of the Journey

A Roadmap of Expat Acculturation

You made it happen. You are now living abroad. You have deftly completed the tasks on a long checklist from having a garage sale back home to figuring out how to open an electricity account in your new home country. You maintained a brave face so far, as the journey that has been paved with twists, turns and the occasional bump in the road. Some you anticipated; others, not so much. Or… maybe you dream of living abroad someday, or just arrived to your new country, or perhaps a few years into your new reality. No matter where you are in the expatriate journey, an understanding of the stages of the expatriate integration process will help to serve as a guide throughout your experience.

  1. Pre-departure: Am I really doing this?

As you prepare for the departure date, you are mixed with feelings of excitement, sadness and a fair bit of exhaustion, as you try to tie up the innumerable loose ends. Bittersweet conversations with friends who are so excited for you, the awkward feeling of goodbyes and your internal realization – this chapter of life is coming to an end. You are surprised by the strength of the occasional wave of emotions you feel, but you put your game face on, board the plane and jump into a new reality.

  1. Honeymoon: Vacations never felt like this

Your expatriate journey begins with the honeymoon stage, where you are constantly stimulated by a barrage of new experiences: sights, sounds and smells that feed your insatiable curiosity. Your excitement is palpable as you explore your new environs and carry out everyday tasks. You are left with the same thought over and over: “Wow, this is where I live?” You are truly impressed with yourself and how you have handled this momentous shift; however, the initial elation ebbs after the first month or so as uncertainty shows itself from under your adrenaline-filled armor.

  1. Culture Shock: Is this really happening?

The “newness” of your transplant home is wearing off, and some of the same things you found so intriguing a few weeks ago now grate on your nerves. It starts slow, but builds as you increasingly can’t help but question the seemingly illogical way things are done, comparing them to the “way they do it back home.” You feel fatigued trying to communicate in a new language and successfully navigate the cultural labyrinth without offending the locals. Minor frustrations build inside you until you feel anger boiling beneath your trying-to-be-calm exterior. You probably thought it would not happen to you, but you have entered the second phase – you are in “culture shock.” Don’t be discouraged; everyone has these feelings to different degrees, but the way you cope in the face of these challenges will define your expatriate experience.

  1. Transformation: Finding your groove

The transformation stage is longer than the culture shock stage, but with some time, frustration and longing for something familiar are replaced with a true appreciation of the lifestyle and culture of your new country… You are becoming an expat. To make this transition much easier, there are important coping activities and tools that you can practice and utilize. For example, you should establish new routines, introduce yourself to your neighbors, make new friends (not just other expats!), and participate in local activities (clubs, events, celebrations, sporting events, etc). This transformative stage will be an incredibly rewarding process as you learn and experience the cultural richness of your new home empowering you with a deeper understanding of your own cultural identity.

  1. Integration: A whole new reality

You have accepted and embraced your new lifestyle by successfully bridging the cultural chasm that once existed. While you will never be a native, you have transformed yourself into an expatriate, a citizen of the world. There will be the occasional frustration, but all in all, you are generally happy and at ease in your new life. Some expats will never reach the final stage as they remain stuck in the transformative stage, isolated and unwilling to accept and embrace the cultural nuances of their host country. Others take it to the other extreme rejecting their own culture, which can be equally divisive to long-term happiness. For expats on short-term assignments, achieving full-integration poses to be a challenge since often they leave while in the Culture Shock or Transformation stage.

While standard “cross-cultural training” programs and off-the-shelf “fact sheets” on particular countries provide value, they do not fully prepare one for the array of personal and professional challenges associated with relocation abroad. Early on in my expatriate experience, I wish I would have experienced the power of coaching. I enlisted a coach mid-way. Here’s what I found (and now practice): “the power of coaching provides a personalized approach that makes it possible for you to rediscover your identity and allows you to engage your healthy sense of curiosity to become a contributing member and leader within your new community and workplace.” This changed everything for me.

Each person’s experience is unique, and there are no hard and fast timetables to adjusting to your new life, but there are tools and strategies that make this process faster and easier. This incredible experience is as much personal as it is geographic; your journey will be defined by how you react to the more challenging moments.

Stay tuned for Part II, the author’s personal expatriate experience….

About the Author:

Michelle Sullivan is co-founder and Managing Partner of Dragonfly Consultants and is an expert in Cross-Cultural Communication. As an executive coach, she works with individuals and organizations in the areas of Expatriate, Repatriate and Intercultural challenges. Michelle is Certified in Human Synergistics Organizational Culture model (OCI) and tools and leverages Hofstede’s Cultural Dimensions in her coaching and leadership work with her clients.

Michelle holds and MS in Global Business & Leadership and has guest lectured at the University of San Diego on the topic of working in cross-cultural teams and abroad.

She’s held corporate leadership roles in global environments for over 20 years and lived, worked and studied in Mexico, Argentina, Ireland and France –  living in five countries in six years with her husband, who is a dual US/Irish citizen. Michelle currently splits her time between California and Mexico.

My Name is On the Label

My Name is on the Label: (My name is courage. My name is math whiz. My name is loser. My name is fat. My name is old. My name is strength.)

Let’s start with something simple: Math.  For many years, math and science were the domain of men.  Girls grew up believing they were not supposed to be good at Math. They were encouraged into Language Arts, Social Science and History.  And this twentieth century cultural phenomenon created a generation of women who believe they have no aptitude for Math. The most important word here is “believe.”  Because, we know the truth is that women can do Math!

I was that generation. Until 11th grade, I always received good grades in math. But, I grew up with the idea that I should be good at English, History and Social Science, not that I could be an engineer or a scientist or a mathematician.  On the other hand, I also grew up with a mother who worked and broke barriers for women entering the workforce.  So… I also believed I could have a career; I could be successful.  Ultimately, I am happy with my career path. However, I can’t help but wonder how my generation contributed to the void in STEM careers for women.

We are influenced on many different levels to wear labels that shape who we are. Like the example above, there is a cultural/societal element.  There is also family.  And finally, there is our genetic blueprint.  All of which create the complexity of who we are and the narrative in which we live.

Some of these labels we wear proudly and boldly; others work quietly in the background. They sometimes work together harmoniously, but often they undermine each other.  They feed the voices of our inner critic.  And they become the affirmations that foster our positive mental energy that allow us to move out of our comfort zones. The question we have to ask is: What labels are you living with today?  How are they influencing your choices and decisions?

Are they stopping you from doing or being what you want to do or be?

Or

Are they enabling you to defy your own expectations ?

About the author: Adrienne Seal is a co-founder and Managing Partner of Dragonfly Consultants.  She is an ICF professional certified coach.  She is known and appreciated for her insight into human nature and team dynamics and her thoughtfulness and innovative approaches to coaching, organization effectiveness and culture transformation.

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